Amid Controversy, Wizards of the Coast Urges Players Remember the Spirit of Magic 30: 50% More Profit

Announcements from Wizards of the Coast are no stranger to controversy. Recently it was disclosed that Transformer cards will be in an official expansion. Boosters of illegal cards will be sold for $250 per pack and un-sets are now constructed-legal for … reasons. Wizards of the Coast wants players going into Money 30 Magic 30 to ignore the controversy and remember the spirit of the event: the never-ending quest for more money.

Money 30 Magic 30 is a celebration of three decades of Magic: The Gathering. It’s about honoring the game we all love and an opportunity for us to spend time with fans. Or, those willing to spend a significant amount of money on tickets, travel, and accommodations. Of course we want to thank fans supporting our goal of infinite growth. So, we’re allowing attendees to play Magic at a couple tables we set up free of charge. Well, not technically free since it costs a good amount of money to get in. But free as in we don’t want even more money from you to play Magic there.*

*Subject to change.

To those of us with eyes it may seem like the point of Money 30 Magic 30 is to milk whales. However, WotC maintains that it’s just a celebration for all players. Especially those willing to help Hasbro meet it’s profit goal of a 50% increase over the next three years.

“We have a lot in store for Money 30 Magic 30 attendees. First, staying true to our product, we’ve decided to segregate our fans based on their expendable income. For example, our VIP lounge is exclusive to our affluent players. We’re calling that ‘District One’. It’s a way for our most favorite fans to relax and enjoy the event without the riff-raff from the poors. Inside, our VIPs will experience the thrill of discovering new rooms that each cost more money to enter than the previous.

“Additionally, our command zone is exclusive so no worries of a new player wandering over with a pre-con. Monetary gatekeeping ensures pods are evenly matched as most deck’s power-level will match the size of their pilot’s bank account. Speaking of bank accounts, our $250 booster packs will further draw distinction between classes. As a reminder, don’t attempt to play with the cards you buy at Money 30 Magic 30. You wouldn’t want to damage your status symbols by trying to play with them.

“We’re confident fans are going to have a one-of-a-kind experience paying time and time again to play the game they love. We can already imagine the thrill of buying merch, purchasing Secret Lairs, and forking over $40 to go buy drinks at our Crimson Anniversary. Not to worry, if you’re like us and can’t stand the smell of poverty, we’re holding another exclusive party at this event that will be invite-only. 

At time of press Wizards of the Coast wanted to issue an urgent reminder to those traveling to Vegas that the ATM fees are super high, so be sure to withdraw a ton of cash before arriving!

omg. dry erase cards. Of all the dry erase cards these are the driest. “How dry are they?” As dry as my wife after hearing me talk about how great MTG is. Sahara dry.

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4 thoughts on “Amid Controversy, Wizards of the Coast Urges Players Remember the Spirit of Magic 30: 50% More Profit

    1. I love the extreme here. When someone snarkily points out the increased focus on premium product that further stratifies the player base, and continued catering to those who will spend exorbitant amounts on a never ending wave of exclusives and nonsense, your brilliant way to chime is “Uh, uh, they should just make it free then, right? Such business! Much smart!” Just say you hate people that can’t spend all their money on overpriced cardboard and move on, you git.

    2. No one is saying they should give it away for free. However, the way they are milking the player base is getting ridiculous.

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