Neighbors Call Police On EDH Game After 4th Rhystic Study Hit the Board

BUGTUSSLE, Ky. — Local police were called Friday when Caroline and Bob Sinow became concerned over their neighbor’s well-being. The disturbance began around 7:00 PM and slowly escalated as the night progressed. We sat down with the elderly couple who took us through what happened that night.

“It’s the new boys who moved in next door,” Caroline told us. “Shy, yes, but they seem nice. Anyway, we could tell they were having a party. Not a big one, but we could hear a few distinct voices; walls are thin, you see. We thought, ‘good for them’ you know? They don’t seem like the popular type, we’ll just leave it at that. But by 8 o’clock when we were heading to bed is when the trouble began.”


“‘You’ll pay’, they said,” Bob said. “‘You’ll all pay.’ That’s what they kept on saying. At least that’s what we thought they were saying. We didn’t know who was paying for what, but it sounded like trouble to me. It sounded like all of them were saying it to each other. I said to Caroline, I said ‘it’s not a party it’s a drug deal. A drug deal gone wrong.'”

Bob dialed 911 expressing his concerns to the dispatcher who sent a unit out to investigate the disturbance.

“The cops were kind of dicks about it,” John Lemur, Caroline and Bob’s neighbor. “When we told them we were just playing Magic cards they seemed skeptical asking us ‘do people still actually play that?’ then went on to tell each other the nerds they knew in school that used to play ‘that lame ass game.’ Anyway, we house banned Rhystic Study – each of us was playing a deck with blue in it, so . . . well, you know. We’ve never had four out at once before, so yeah it got kind of crazy.”

Before ending the interview we sarcastically remarked that it “must have been a wild night.”

omg. dry erase cards. Of all the dry erase cards these are the driest. “How dry are they?” As dry as my wife after hearing me talk about how great MTG is. Sahara dry.

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