Marvel Snap Announced as Official Sponsor of Massive Post-Thanksgiving Poops

The hot new digital CCG Marvel Snap has been making waves among players. This trend continued today with the announcement of Marvel Snap as the official sponsor of everyone’s massive post-Thanksgiving shit.

“People all realize Marvel Snap’s game length is basically the perfect amount of time one needs to have a nice poop. I haven’t dropped the kids off at school without it since I started playing. It’s something I recommend to everyone, though reactions are mixed. I’m not entirely sure why the subject of taking a dump is so taboo. It’s as natural as breathing and something everyone does. Why shouldn’t I be able to recommend a nice activity to pass the time. That’s why I was so glad to see the sponsorship”

Reports have been hitting social media in response to the announcement.

“I’m glad someone finally suggested something to do that’s a bit more engaging than doom-scrolling while I’m busting a grumpy. Everyone has this assumption that the day after Thanksgiving is supposed to be able trampling other people to buy a TV for 50% off after being marked up 200%. What people don’t realize is that it’s about doing battle. Those massive plates coupled with pie are on their way out and it’s going to be no easy task. Why do you think they call it Black Friday? It’s because your poop shouldn’t be that color and you should totally go see a doctor about it.”

Other companies have followed the announcement with their own support.

“We saw an ad with those animated bears that are obsessed with toilet paper playing the game while struggling a little too hard. Maybe they need a little less honey and some more fiber. Either way, it’s interesting to see so many unique ideas and brands adopting Marvel Snap as the official accessory when you need to ‘drop it like it’s hot’. When you’re done, you’re walking away a winner, even if you lost.”

At time of press, rumors have been spreading regarding a licensing deal to create the world’s very first branded, Marvel Snap poop knife which is slated to hit stores in quarter two, 2023.

omg. dry erase cards. Of all the dry erase cards these are the driest. “How dry are they?” As dry as my wife after hearing me talk about how great MTG is. Sahara dry.

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