Deck Box Just Wishes You’d Take Them Out For Dinner Once In A While, That’s All

Man on a date with his deckbox

We all take things for granted at some point in our lives whether they be romantic partners, jobs, or family members. But have you ever stopped and thought about your deck box? You’ve been sliding that deck of yours inside your deck box without hesitation or thought for years now. You ever stop to think about how your deck box feels? One deck box thinks that, even though they’re happy to keep taking your deck as often as you’d like, they’d at like to be taken to dinner once in a while.

“It’s about feeling like I’m still special,” Red Satin Tower said. “Don’t get me wrong, I love decks and love having them inside me, but getting out and feeling pretty every so often isn’t a big ask. Hell, I’d even take Applebee’s.”

Other deck boxes have followed Red Satin Tower’s suit, claiming that they too deserve to be treated like they’re more than mere objects.

“You don’t know what it’s like being an Ultimate Guard Boulder… having someone think they can get their entire commander deck double-sleeved in Dragon Shields in me. Sometimes I can make it work, but I draw the line when they think they can add tokens too. After all I go through day after day… Dinner? Try European vacation.”

However, others don’t see what the big deal is and think the deck box to player relationship should remain professional.

“The more the merrier for me,” said The Academic, Tolarian Community College’s star pupil. “Double sleeved and perfect hards and tokens too. Bring it. You got some dice? I got room. Planechase too? You dog. Dinner? Nah. We’re eating in since I’m ready to go best of three.”

Could it be that the paradigm shift in how we treat those closest to us will gravitate beyond our deck boxes? Perhaps one day we’ll finally realize it’s time to treat those playmats we rely on so often to a massage or give that spindown a soak in the hot tub.

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